Howdy from Colorado,
Michelle and I rolled in (on four wheels, not two) to Colorado last night. Last time I was in this state I was pushing east through Durango and Pagosa Springs. What a difference a week makes!
I've had a few days of drive time to decompress from the RAAM and I think this process will continue for many moons. Literally everyone I've spoken with lately has bandied about the terms "hero," "superhero," "amazing racer," etc. I must say that I do appreciate the acknowledgment of what I've just done, but honestly I feel like an average rider and an average, everyday kind of guy.
I want you to understand that each of us can achieve victory in our own special and unique way. My victory came at the hands of 11 days of brutal, grueling and sometimes inhumane struggle for competition and survival. Your victory can come after a hard day at the office, dealing with a rude neighbor or working through a problem at school with your kid. David Bowie was and still is right, we can be heroes.
Your kindness, support and prayers fueled my fire across the country. The thought of Michelle reading me your comments while out on the road still brings me to tears and helps me remember that nobody is every completely alone. The solo RAAM experience is one of isolation and loneliness and so your thoughts and support cannot be underestimated.
My body and mind are going to take time to heal. I spoke with Bernie on the phone yesterday and told him that I'm feeling slightly weak and vulnerable. The past couple of weeks stripped me down to the bare essentials, quite literally I was a cycling organism, nothing more, nothing less. I wasn't a brother, a firefighter, a boyfriend or a son. I was a bare human, peeled of ego or malice or greed or any other characteristic that may manifest itself day in and day out. The next several months will be a rebuilding process for my body and my mind. Your continued support and understanding will continue to fuel my fire as I move forward.
Yes, I'm already making a game plan for next year and beyond. I've put the feelers out there for continuing the Team Strong Heart legacy and building on the amazing first few chapters we've put out there so far. Solo RAAM will probably not happen for me next year, but RAAM will happen in some fashion. Solo RAAM is still out there and yes, I do want to tackle that projct again. 2010?
I've already begun creating a "race recap" of sorts, trying to capture some of the infinite number of highs and lows during my race across the country. My writing hasn't taken me to Arizona quite yet and already I'm at about 5 pages single spaced.
Honestly, reviewing the race is a somewhat "painful" experience. I experienced many sorts of trauma during the event, but frankly, I wouldn't have changed any of it. From physical injury to firing crew members, to pushing through when I couldn't possibly muster anything more to turning the corner and checking in to the last time station. The 2008 RAAM was a formative and life changing experience.
I suffered so that the kids at Camp Odayin would and will eventually suffer less. Hopefully my efforts demonstrated to them, to myself and my crew, to my family and friends that when Tim Case is in your life, you have a dedicated, insightful and hardscrabble fighter who will go the distance when times are good and when times are bad.
The decisions and choices we make each and every day were encapsulated and pressurized in RAAM. Do you quit or do you move forward, do you rest or do you continue the fight, do you roll over and plead mercy or do you go on the hunt and push on, are you a person of integrity and character, or are you a person of deceit, will you be honest within your own limitations or will you try and be something you are not, will you lay down every single ounce of your self for others or will you pack things up and head home early, will you live and breath your passion for the sport of cycling or will you fold up and give in? Choose wisely.
In the upcoming weeks I'll be posting my recap of RAAM, along with photos and random thoughts from the saddle. I've decided to break the story up into three parts, coming from the three time stations we had to get to in order to continue on, Taos, New Mexico, the Mississippi River and then finally Annapolis, Maryland.
Stay tuned, keep me in your thoughts and always, keep the rubber side down.
TC
